The kids are finally back at school and the house is quiet once again! As much as I am nervous for my little ones being back doing more mainstream things, I am glad to have a bit of normality in my life.
For the past couple of weeks I feel this kind of malaise. An over energetic boredom where I can’t sit still, but also unable to be motivated to do much. My Stravaachievements have suffered and sleep alludes me some nights until the small hours. Leaving me lacking energy and craving a nap in the early afternoon.
I came across a theory of my ‘Surge Capacity’ being depleted and there may be something behind it. Because I feel as things are returning to normal, the reserves of energy I was using have run dry and I need a rest to charge them back up. Despite having only just returned from a a break away, you would think that I would be feeling refreshed! But I feel like I am back on the treadmill and going much faster than when I got off.
So, a slightly more reserved newsletter this week, one that was much later in being finalised, and feels a little rushed. Rest and recuperation are more important than the times you push hard, and something that many people forget. You have to learn to peak and trough, it’s just part of life, because without the downtime, you can’t head back up again.
Failure To Connect
Some weird practices exist in my life. I don't have to touch lampposts as I walk past them or anything, but I need to do something in order to get by and connecting is one of them.
Since starting writing morning pages I have stolen a morning outline from Ali Abdaal's video and put in a few areas that I want to get done during the day and record as I go along. One of the tabs I use is ‘connect’ in which I aim to try and reach out to someone I have not spoken to in a while and catch up.
This has been easy to start with, but as I back more and more away from general social media, I am finding it hard to connect with many people. Email is great for these kinds of things, but I have soon run out of peoples email addresses. Or struggle to find reasons to reach out through email, I guess I could just send a “hey, how are you doing” but I feel like I should write more when stuffing it into someones inbox.
One of the things that Twitter does really well is give you the feeling of community, everyone around you shadows your feelings. They love the things you do and get mad at the things you get mad at. Perhaps this isn’t helped from WFH and the lower levels of interaction, which will only get less now everyone is out of the house all day.
There is only really one platform that I feel a connection too — Twitter is my thing — always has been and perhaps always will be. I don’t feel the same about anything else. I have not used Facebook at all for years, Instagram is ok I guess, but something about the constant snack size updates from Twitter just appeals to my brain.
I am not alone, as Jaron Lanier puts it “there's some kinds of people who particularly get Twitter addictions and they're often journalists”. So there must be something about Twitter specifically that keeps me coming back for more. The real time flow of information can be addictive and I get a huge fear of missing out because I can miss inside jokes and have to play catch up after just a few minutes of inactivity.
Sure you can pick up and put down Twitter really easily, meaning that it can fit itself nicely into any little slice of boredom, but it really excels when you put in the time to experience everything that goes on. I am really trying to use Twitter more intentionally recently because it is my digital crack, but the timeline promotes a kind of completionism that appeals to my addictive personality and I simply cannot get this hit anywhere else.
I realised after sending last weeks newsletter that I never completed the story of my lust for a simpler time. It didn’t end as far back as I wanted to go, because there is no denying in the modern world I pretty much have to have an smartphone, but it thankfully got pretty far.
I am now the proud owner of two iPhone SE’s (SEes? SI?). I bought a used OG iPhone SE first, and used this for a week of peace. The size shift was much easier than I expected and my non essential usage dropped to zero. During this period though the battery life was a huge issue, and I resorted to buying a 2020 iPhone SE instead.
I am not exaggerating when I say that this phone is the best one I have ever owned. For £429 I have a phone that is much lighter, easier to manage and has all the modern innards I love. I have made some bold statements on not being interested in anything new Apple has to offer, but I honestly could not see myself using anything else without a really good reason. I may write a longer thought post on ‘downgrading’ at a later date, but it safe to say I am over the moon with a simpler tech life.
I have a new level of emotional ambivalence towards my smartphone and I wish others did. I love the connectivity options it gives me, but don’t like having to use it — weird I know.
Sign da ‘ting
Now my iPad has gone to its new home I suddenly had an influx of things that either myself or my wife need to sign and email back. Why is this such an issue when using anything else other than an iPad?
I managed to wobbly scratch my name using the mouse on my Mac, but I really wish other competent options existed. To couple with this, who needs things signing and sending back in 2020, but never the less these kinds of things should be solved by now. I guess I could use a Galaxy Note….. No.
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Before I go
I would like to say a big thank you, we passed a big milestone this week in gaining more newsletter subscribers than I ever had podcast subscribers! More and more people sign up after every issue and it makes my heart soar whenever I see new readers.
Quick reminder that you can contribute if you like, either as a member of my website, which goes directly to me. Or a one off payment though Ko-fi.
Thank you once again for joining me on my journey and reading my rambling. Take the very best care of yourselves.
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